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Day 4: Relax - Let Your Soul Enjoy the Ride
Relax, Relax, RELAX!! Something I hear people tell me all of the time. This is the area that I struggle with the most. I am a worrier, and becoming a mother didn't help that at all. My soul suffers greatly from this "condition" that I have, if you will. I am always finding something to be worried about. It is easy as a mother, sometimes I feel like it is downright necessary to stay up at night biting my nails and not trusting Jesus....especially around flu season!
Anyways, after speaking to many mommas (especially 1st time moms) I have realized that this is not a rare problem among mothers. Being a mom to an almost 2 year old, outgoing, knows no fear wild child has had my worry wheels a turning non stop since the moment he was conceived. Although, we have had serious things arise that has required serious medical attention...my worrying has not changed the outcome one bit....matter of factly, I believe it has hindered. I have had myself soo stressed out over things that I can't change, that I failed to take the time to just sit and soak it all in. For instance, after a severe bleed while pregnant with my son....instead of soaking in the pregnancy - all I did was wish it to be over so I could have a healthy newborn. I never enjoyed the pregnancy, I was too busy worrying. Once he was here and healthy besides a few minor conditions, all I did was wish away his newborn stage because all he did was cry and never sleep. I was too worried about me ever getting sleep again and feeling normal again to enjoy the sleepless nights cuddled up to my newborn.
You get the picture right! Worry, worry, worry, worry....well now I feel as if though I have a tired, old soul and I am only 25. Even though I have spend countless hours being tense and stressed, those hours have been wasted on nothing because they have done not one thing to make my son the healthy, happy boy he is today.
It took me up until my son was 6-7 months old to realize what was going on. That moment the realization of it all hit me, I decided no more. And that was that. I have learned to put it in God's hands and God has blessed me with the gift of relaxation. One of God's best blessings ever! God has wanted to spoil me with this gift the whole time, but my stubborn self was too busy listening to the world instead of Him. I have realized a few things since then, things I wish I would have known beforehand:
You can always find something to worry about, if you want to.
Life will always have something for you to worry about. Nothing in life will ever be perfect or go the way you want it to go. Just accept that fact and roll with it. Do the best that you can, and make the best out of every situation...and then relax and leave it in God's hands.
Worrying & stress doesn't do anything but waste time.
I have never met a single soul that has a testimonial about how worrying and stress saved their life, or their child's life. But I can personally tell you, it has wasted part of my life away. Memories I could have been making have been destroyed by my sinful lack of trust in God. I am also certain that it can actually physically shorten your lifespan. That right there is the true meaning of wasting time.
Praying helps, I promise.
Our pediatrician had warned us that if Sawyer's clogged tear duct hadn't healed on it's own by the time he was 12 months old, he would need to have a surgery to open it up. Although a minor surgery, I wanted to avoid that at all costs. So for 11 months of Sawyer's life, we followed all of the pediatrician's advice on how we could help his tear duct to open with no success. We had been warned that the longer it was clogged, the less of a chance it would open on it's own. I was a starting to worry, but then I decided that I would just give it to God. That night while I was rocking my little goopy eyed boy to bed, I prayed, "God, please open Sawyer's tear duct...I really don't want for him to have to have surgery. I know you can do it if it be your will." Less than 3 days later, his tear duct opened. All I had to do was to give it to God, and ask. 11 months of us trying to do it on our own and I never thought to ask God to do it for us. How simple. Thank you Lord! God loves us, he wants to help us...all you have to do is ask. He might not always answer right away or in the form we expect it in....but sometimes God shows off and I feel blessed to have seen him show off. Now whenever I feel myself start to stress, I give it to God. I have seen him work, I trust Him. He will see you through, no matter how small or how little. Just give it a try next time.
I have learned to let God take control of my life and we play more, stress less, sleep better, and soak life in. You only get one shot here on Earth, don't waste all the opportunities to make memories with your family like I did for that short period of time. I am so thankful I learned my lesson when I did and stopped wasting my precious years of youth letting Satan steal my joy. Giving my worries and stresses to God has been the best decision I have made for my family. It is a struggle to not revert to my old ways at times, but I serve a big God, bigger than any problem this world can throw my way. Go soothe your soul, pray your worries away and play your heart out.
FYI: I am re-reading what I have just typed above, and I am so glad I chose this topic to write on. Even though I have overcame worrying with my son, marriage and finances, I have just realized that I have already started worrying about how the future is going to play out on having a second child. We are thinking of trying within the next year and I have been dreading it....why? Well, worry of course ha! I have been worried that I would have problems with the pregnancy again, Sawyer will hate his sibling, and I will never sleep again! So I am so grateful the Lord laid this on my heart. This post helped my eyes to be opened yet again to all the unnecessary worry that I have allowed to creep back in to my life. I hope this post helps you guys as much as it did me! Bless you all!
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